A peek inside my head

En Español

Photo by Kym Ellis on Unsplash

During the last months, I've practiced a new way of approaching technology, called Digital Minimalism. I think now it's a good time to open it up, and share it with the people who know me in person.

Let's start by explaining why I decided to start doing this. In the previous blog I wrote, I explained that I wanted to take a break from Social Media. I was feeling that I was spending too much time on it and getting almost nothing in return.

Suddenly I stumbled across a book called “Digital Minimalism: Choosing a Focused Life in a Noisy World” by Cal Newport. The first thing that catch my attention was the Minimalism word in the title.

I consider myself a minimalistic person, in terms of the possession I own and the lifestyle I have, and this is exactly what I was looking for: introduce a minimalistic approach into my Digital life.

At the moment of writing this post, I already read the book twice. So yes, I liked it and recommend it to anyone! I would love to share my learnings regarding some topics it covers, in order to:

1. Express my opinion and how I am planning to put it into practice
2. Share it, in case you are looking to make some changes in your digital life and don't know how to do it, or it might be the case that you never even think of it as a problem.

Friendly reminder: Before jumping into the book, I would like to clarify that I am going to be talking about my life choices and the way I see things. By no means, I want to judge how other people decide to live their life :)

What is it exactly?

Digital Minimalism can be seen as a lifestyle, in which we are fully aware of the place that Technology plays in our life. The definition provided in the books is as follows:

A philosophy of technology use in which you focus your online time on a small number of carefully selected and optimized activities that strongly support things you value, and then happily miss out on everything else.

From here I learn two things:

1. This philosophy doesn't mean that you have to stop using any kind of Digital Device or be fully disconnected from the world. It emphasizes using the technology in hand-picked activities, to be mind-full regarding the way we interact with the technology.
2. We are constantly worried that we are not up-to-date about what's going on in our friends' life, in the city, news, etc., and in fact, we don't have to. It's totally fine to not know, your life is not going to change, promise.

Practices

One of the things I like about this book is the idea of Practices: a set of recommendations to apply the principles from above. In a nutshell, they are the formulas they gave in Chemistry or Physics to apply the theoretical concepts. Very handy!

In this part, I would describe the relevant ones for me, and how I am currently tackling them.

Don't Click “Like”

Besides the catchy title, this practice hides a quite strong meaning behind, that many people can't see (me including). Yes, it's related to the action of “Like” inside Facebook, but nowadays, you can find this feature in any Social Media platform: Heart on Instagram, Like and Retweet on Twitter, Like on YouTube, etc.

The whole problem with this feature is that it's the worst informative communication way that you can use when connecting with others. We are just sending one bit of information about the state of the sender. We think we are in touch with others, but instead, we are sending almost nothing ...

Instead of that, the book recommends acting more towards rich communication. For example, instead of leaving a like/comment, send a Private message in which you can schedule a meeting or call to keep up to date with this person. It will be way more personal, rich, and fulfilling, improving your relationships.

Consolidate Texting

Let's be clear, we all use any kind of messaging system, it can be WhatsApp, Telegram, Messenger, or even SMS. At the same time, we make the following assumption: whenever we receive a message from someone, we have to answer right away, because yeah ... we have to. And this is behavior, like it or not, makes us a slave to our phone.

This practice suggests that we keep our phone in Do Not Disturb mode by default. Making all the notifications on our phones silent, so we are not going to get interrupted by these annoying notifications anymore.

In my experience, this has worked out. It took me some weeks to get used to it because besides not receiving the notifications directly into my phone, I was opening the app and checking them manually. But overall, I check my messages less frequently than before.

The last thing about this point is that many people might get annoyed about your delay to answering, they are simply not used to this kind of communication. In my experience, nothing will happen and in case they are interested in talking with you, they will continue reaching to you.

Delete social media from your phone

I used to consider myself an addict on Facebook when that platform was widely used among my group of friends. I remember sitting on my computer, opening the Home Page, and scrolling endlessly to check the status of my “friends”, to see what they are up to, every day, for hours and hours ...

After the mobiles got better, we all downloaded Social Media apps, and the number of hours that we spent scrolling increased enormously. Now any idle moment, waiting for the Bus, queueing in the Supermarket, or even in the restroom, is going to be the perfect excuse to open our Social Media and start the scrolling game.

This practice recommends you stay far away from the mobile versions of these services. You can still have them accessible through the computer, in case you still want to use them or check what's going on. But as soon as you don't have the app installed anymore, you are going to open it fewer times on Social Media.

And on top of that, you can use all these idle moments to your advantage! In my case, I am carrying always with me a book in my bag or something you can allow yourself to stare at the wall and think about your thoughts. Having thoughts from other people coming to you every single minute is super tiring, and we don't realize it.

My practice – Free Sundays

I developed this practice by myself, without reading it somewhere on the web or any book, and honestly is one of the golden rules that I follow nowadays.

The idea is quite simple: do NOT schedule anything for Sundays. No meeting. No sports. Nothing. Leave it as a blank spot in your week, and let your brain rest.

During this day you can allow yourself to work on the things that you always want to work on, but never find time during the week:

• Sit on the couch and read that book.
• Watch that film that someone recommended to you.
• Write a blog (like this one).
• Visit the coffee shop around the corner.

My only recommendation is not to push yourself. Take it slow, and enjoy the day before starting the next week :)

Last Words

It took me like a month to finish this post, and I am so happy to be able to share my opinion on this topic with my friends and family! I truly think that we have to be more aware of how we deal with our digital life before it will represent a problem to us and our relatives.

I hope you like the reading, if so please reach to me telling me your own opinion. Most probably you know how to find me :)

Thanks for reading.

Ema

En Español

“Put your phone away to be connected.” – unknown

Hello there 👋 Yeah, I know it's been a while since I've been here. Well, if you are reading this, it means that I'm not dead! 🎉

I was checking when was the last time I posted something on social media, and it was 4 months ago. In the perspective of a year, it's one-third of the year ...

The funny thing is I've never realized I was off for that long time until I received a message on Facebook from a friend. He asked me if I was alright and the reason why I stopped posting so abruptly.

I was never the kind of person who posts one story per day or answers messages in minutes. I would say that 1 or 2 times per month I was sharing some pictures on my Instagram and Facebook.

So, what happened?

Well, I started to change some habits regarding how technology affects my life and the way I use my time. During this process, I knew that social media was something that was stealing time from my day-to-day.

It's not only posting some pictures and forgetting about it ... Your friends will react to it, therefore you will make open the application, and answer the comments.

This ends up creating a snowball effect of distraction. In which you are constantly unblocking and blocking your phone just to check if someone reacted to your post ... This is exactly the reason why I wanted to drop social media.

Most probably it's not the fault of these applications for causing this addiction in our life, or maybe yes 🤔 But the truth is that they are just applications, and we are the ones who decide which use we are giving to them ... So in the end, it's our fault to create this co-dependence.

“Use social as a tool, don't be used by social media.” – Kelly Martin

Did something change?

Actually, yes! I started working on projects that I've been holding for some time and had some new experienced on the way. In a nutshell:

• I started my journey into the world of Finance and Investment. It's funny because everybody knows that it's important, but no one teaches you that during your education ...
• I joined weekly sessions with my first Therapist, and they helped! I didn't have a good time during the first wave of Corona. I learned to open myself more, instead of letting my thoughts affect me.
• I met Yuliia, my girlfriend, and we've been dating now for around 3 months. Thanks to her this third wave of Corona was easier for me. I will share more about it soon 😄
• I started to read books in German, to be more precise: the Harry Potter collection! I've seen a huge boost in my general understanding of text and conversations. So far I'm finishing the third one, and next month I will start with “The Goblet of my Fire” (my favorite movie!), which is 767 pages 🤯
• I passed my probation period in my new company, which means that I'm officially employed (by the Berlin Immigration office). Therefore I finally started the process to get my Permanent Residence in Germany 🇩🇪

Quite some stuff right! It's funny, I used to check my posts on Social Media to remember what happened during a specific time of the year. Here instead, I had to sit and remember.

With this writing, I'm not trying to say “Oh look at how cool I am, and all the things I did” by any means. My goal is to share my opinion regarding social media and my experience of being outside the consumer side for some time.

Something that I can highlight, is the freedom feeling. I could break free from the habit of checking the phone just in case. When I'm with friends I normally leave it downside on a table and take it just for the pictures. Pictures that now I don't feel the need to share.

During this past year with the pandemic, so many things were happening (and not happening as well), which makes us live in automatic mode. Without realizing we spend our life's doing things that don't fill us.

I very nice documentary that triggered me to start with this change is called “The Social Dilemma”, you can find it in Netflix. It discusses the topic of addiction, and also talks about how the organizations are using our information to profit from it and influence us (super important as well!).

Well, I think that will be it for this post. In case I made you think on this topic, it would be very nice if you let me know your opinions by sending me a message. Most probably I won't answer on the same day 😅

Thanks for reading. Ema.

I want to share something different from the rest posts, my experience of doing a fully remote onboard in my new company.

The night before joining, I wasn't able to sleep (which always happens to me when I have these events), so I decided to sit down and put my thoughts in words.

At the moment of writing this paragraph, I already finished my “First Day”, and I think it's quite cool to see what I was thinking just the day before joining in contrast to what happened.

Without delaying furthermore, let's begin!

The day before

After months of waiting for this moment, I am happy to announce that today is my first day at my new company. But despite my excitement, there is something off ...

In contrast with the other “First Day”, this one is going to be at Home. Right here at my desk. In the same chair that I was using for the previous one. That's weird.

Don't get me wrong. I like working from Home. I think it provides a lot of flexibility to people, and one can be more focused because there are almost no external distractions (except you decide to turn on the TV and watch Netflix ...).

But it just feels wrong. To get to know the people with whom I am going to work for the next months via an online video call, instead of meeting them face to face and later go for lunch all together.

I didn't face any of these doubts when moving from the office to home-office schema, but because I knew the whole team before.

Maybe it wasn't the best time to venture into a new job because of all the problems caused by the Virus. At the same time, it was something that I was seeking. And when I look at the big picture, this is just a minor problem.

Luckily I work in an industry in which I can easily co-operate with my team in a remote environment, and also there are plenty of tools that can help with that too. I hope I can develop myself as I always did and get to know my colleagues well-to-do a better job.

Wish me luck 🤞

End of the “First Day”

OMG, what a day! I don't want to join any group meeting in a very long time.

It was a full day of Onboard, from the start of the day until the end, with meetings scheduled every 45 minutes plus breaks of 5/10 minutes to grab some coffee or tea.

The good thing: it's done! Somehow they managed to fit everything: from setting up the laptop, explaining all the HR-related stuff, KPI's, legal, etc. Looking back, I have to admit it was quite impressive.

Remember that I mentioned I was worried about not meeting my team properly? Well, that happened. Because I was doing the onboarding, the only interaction I had was a simple welcome message on the team Slack. So after the first day, I still don't know the faces of my colleagues. Just their Slack profile pictures ...

Luckily tomorrow, I am going to take part in a normal day of work. Joining the first Daily with the team, which I am quite curious to know how it will be. In all the companies I've worked for, they were never the same.

Closing words

Onboards like it or not are going to be exhausting. You are going to go back home with your head spinning because of everything they showed you. Most probably not remembering half of the stuff and with a very long TO-DO list for tomorrow.

I normally don't share this kind of story, but I think a lot of people might find it interesting because of the current situation that we are all living.

Thanks for reading.

Stay safe.

Ema.

During the whole Corona Situation I questioned myself about the following things:

• Where am I really going in life?
• What do I want to do?
• Do I enjoy the moment that I am living?

Those are quite existential questions, and no, I don't think that I am depressed or going to do something stupid ...

These questions are aiming to discover if what I have been doing my whole life is aligned with the values and my dreams for the future.

Looking back

For most of the people I know (including my self), our lives were planned by someone, and no, I'm not talking about God ... I am talking about the society, your family, the social pressure or any external entity that influences you.

So for example, since we are born, we went to the Kinder Garden, then to the primary school and lastly to the secondary school. Most probably these three things were chosen by your family or any closed person you have.

And that's perfect! Because I don't consider that at that early age you are going to be able to make those decisions, and that's the reason why they “picked” for you.

But now you are there, with your secondary school degree and the next question that everybody ask you:

“What are you going to study?” – by everybody ...

So yeah the people/society/ expect from you to study something. Like it or not.

Luckily in my case, I found something that I liked to study. So I spent 6 years of my life, and I am happy to say that I finished that stage with a Diploma that after allowed me to move outside my country.

No matter if you studied something or not, someone will come over you and ask another of those uncomfortable questions:

“Where do you want to work?” or “What do you want to do?” – by everybody again ...

Same scenario as before, the people/society expect from you to have a Job, get a Salary and work. Work every single day ...

At that exactly what I did! Even before finishing my studies I started to work in the field of my Industry, gaining experience (that's how they call it), and living in a pace that I still don't know how did I manage to work and study at the same time ...

Productivity is the key?

Since I started to work, I always hear that one should be ambitious and always look for something better. Do you know the phrase?

Never settle.

I used to say it to my self for mostly self-motivation, in order to do more, study more, work more, etc. more. I do think it's a powerful tool, because liked or not it took me where I am, but it's also quite dangerous and destructive.

This life-style demands that you are always productive (OMG I hate so much this word ...).

The problem that I have with the productivity concept is it doesn't consider the human factor. We are definitely not machine, that can be turned on/off given an instruction. So basically the more productive you are, the less time for yourself you have.

And here some people will reach out and say:

But if I can do more things faster, then I will have more time for my self and to do the things that I want right?

In theory, yes. But in practice, no.

Something that I learned from the whole journey is that, once you are in this mindset of productivity, it's quite hard to get off. So maybe you can finish all the tasks you had for the day, but trust me after you finish them you are going to look for more stuff to do.

And in the end, when you realized you just have done a just bunch of tasks that you “have to/must do”, but nothing for yourself ...

And how this is related to the expectation topic?

Well basically the people/society expect you to be productive, to always look for improvements, to be “better” ...

And that's the topic that I want to bring to the table, I would like to throw some open questions, that I don't have an answer yet but I'm on the way to look for one.

1. Why do we work?
2. Do we really need too much money?
3. What is your ideal job?
4. What do you see yourself doing your whole life?
5. If you wouldn't work, what would you do instead?

The reason behind

I've been asking myself these questions, because before Corona, I was planning to change my life. Literally my plan was to quite everything:

• Leave my job
• Sell my stuff
• Leave my apartment
• Pack one bag with just the stuff that I need
• Travel the world

Sounds fantastic right? Well, not if there is a Pandemic in the whole world ...

It took me some time to realized that my trip was not going to be possible in the near future. But all these things are still in the back of my head, and I wanted to share them with who ever is reading this.

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Closing

As all the posts here, I didn't follow any structure or anything. I literally sit down and write everything that was coming to my head.

But I do hope that it made you think about one thing or two.

And please let stop thinking of being a better version of ourselves and start enjoying the present, because if we don't stop to observe what's going on, at one point we are going to look back and realized that we didn't accomplish what we always wanted ...

Thanks for reading. Ema.

This a topic that I frequently talk with people, but I've never shared publically and today I feel like to write about it. It's going to be about how I felt the evolution of Social Platforms across all these years and some thoughts about how they might change in the future.

Starting from the beginning

I'm a millennial (given the year I was born), and I grow with social networks and connect with people through them too.

The Social Platform that I used the most by far was Facebook. It was the first that arrived in Argentina, and despite all the rumors that they were spying your activity, all the people also started to use it since the beginning.

I recognized that I was a very active user, posting almost every day, constantly checking the notification, and making “new friends” too.

But, there was a moment of disruption, when I said “STOP”. Stop wasting your time by entering every hour to check if some “friend” posted something! Which most probably won't interest me or that I will learn something new from it ...

These applications have some sort of engagement functionality, especially the notification system, that gives you instant gratification as soon as you enter. And in the end, it feels that you need them in your life. And that's bullshit.

Change of behavior

I started using Facebook as an active user than a passive. I was still using the platform, but only to share content with others, and hardly ever entering inside the application “just to check”.

Finally, I managed to recover my time, and I was quite happy with the result!

Some people asked if something happened to me because I wasn't posting as before. I explained why and then arranged to see each other in the next days or just talk.

At this moment, I realized that most of your “friends” on Facebook, are just connections that you made at one point in your life, and they don't care a lot about your post or not something every day.

Posting on Social Media won't give you new friends.

Hero comes a new Challenger

For many years, Facebook was the platform to connect with the people and mainly it was because it had everything: integrated chat, notifications, friend system, media sharing, events, groups, etc. It was the social media with the most amount of features.

But around 2012 (I think), a new social platform started to catch a lot of attention between my friends called: Instagram.

The application was focused more on Photography and media content, so you were forced to only post either pictures or videos.

I was so reluctant to use for so many years, because:

• I felt that the application was quite incomplete. Many features from Facebook were missing and still are until today.
• I had to start from scratch. As it was something new, I had to connect with all my “friends” from Facebook again.
• I didn't want to put any more effort into Social Media. I was trying to use less Facebook, adding Instagram was not going to help at all.

Most of my friends decided to move to Instagram and stop using Facebook. So what's the point of using a platform that no